Truly truth

If the word “truth” generates discomfort or ignites an emotion within ourselves, could it be that this emotion is something we have to first address?  Like the word “love”, or  “religion”, the word “truth” brings forth a lot of unresolved emotions.  Could it be, we have been actually taught what this word does not actually define?

In this life, intellectualism is not my interest.  I am not passionate about the what or how, what we learn in books, what appears in the news or magazines.

I don’t have a scientific answer to why those things don’t interest me other than, I know there is somewhere within me that knows what is truly important.  Although I cannot prove any of these things, and it is not my role to do so, it does not therefore mean I do not know what is true or not.

Therefore, to most of the world, I cannot explain many things that I have felt, and because of this, I have bought into the belief that I am inadequate, not worthy to be heard, and wanted to give up and just remain mute.

Yet, for me, truth has always felt very close to home.

What truth means in the temporal world, is largely, what has been accepted as the norm.  But what is the norm?  How did the norm come about?  If enough people believe and accept something, it becomes normal and hence, true, correct?  But is that truly truth?

What if, the majority of the world has chosen to believe in something that is comfortable and convenient?

Then, is the truth we think we know, truly truth?

No, I cannot prove truth.  Yet like love, I know truth actually cannot divide and separate, because whether we believe in it or not, we can all feel truth. What divides is when we grasp onto my truth being true and your truth being untrue.

And the most awesome thing is, truth can only be, it does not judge what you believe in or not, it does not wish to prove you right or wrong, it does not need followers or supporters, it just is and will be.

 

 

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The Real Me

From young I taught my child the real him is that which is, and everything else is that which is not.

The real him is when he is simply living his Essence, nothing but the open radiance that he is. He is openly loving, not in contraction in needing love. He is pure joy and no living being can argue that.

As a wee babe, he lives this state much more. With growing up, he has chosen to experience other states which are not the full truth of him. Just like everyone of us.

Consequently, there will be more time when he is lost in the emotions that run him—anger, especially, and if he continues to deny his overwhelming feelings, he will very frequently turn to numbing activities such as television and video games, in attempts to block out these feelings.

Only because of my own long and tedious journey and eventual choice to return, has allowed me the awareness to witness my child’s process. And honestly, never is this easy for a mother to face in truthfulness.

Some moments I will fall into the emotional trap too, other times in desperation I may revert to control, only because I have absorbed my son’s pain, which sometimes ignite my own and am looking desolately for a way out of it. Yet these never work in the true sense, as they do not bring either of us back to the harmony that we are.

I began testing other ways, for my boy, as well for myself. I allowed him his time and his outbreaks if necessary, but rather than taking the energy on, I worked on my own non-interference and non-absorbing skills. When I am more than not in my own inner-heart, the stillness remains even though my baby is in an outburst, and how immensely important it is for me to be that stillness, especially when he is not, for the both of us.

This morning, my child woke up after a deeply revitalizing sleep. He came to me in a strong hug and said, “I am the true me”.

I held him tight, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “This, is what I would like to honor you for, the whole and true you. Not your grades at school, not anything else, but this. Even if you only live this for a brief moment, because of my Love for you, I would like to remind you of this.”

What more do we live for in life, but for these moments of Soul-full connection, when one by one, we remember. With remembrance and honesty, then the choice becomes ours. And there is nothing more precious than meeting each other in our trueness.

I truly love you.

It is all very quiet

It is all very quiet.

Crowds everywhere, nicam languages, money clothes, unending dining, new year merchandise, friends, family, business associates…

But all is very quiet.

Within my heart.

I heard my heart song.

The body chaperoning the mind, well, almost always.

(Oh, how sweet.)

But first my face grew tender, a smile unfolding like tendrils.

I felt the fire.

Warming my blood on a 6C night.

The wind joining in the carousing of the festivities, yet

I was awed, intoxicated by the fire of my heart.

It is all very quiet.

I became the fish

That did not get wet.

And slithered into oblivion.

I Love You

I am quite forgetful and require much reminding.

And in my life, there are many benevolent Souls who have agreed to help me remember, the truth of who I am.  Relationships are my very precious lessons of this lifetime. I have learned and learned and still have not mastered the lesson of not giving my power away when in a relationship. However, as I mature in consciousness, I am less and less inclined to allow this lovelessness to be in my life.

My will to learn has been stubborn like a bull. However much I have been completely stripped naked in selfness in a relationship, it has not made me retreat and afraid to learn more. I know the only way for me the return to true Harmony is to face myself.

Every happening in life is my own creation, those that guide me to return are co-creations with the Divine. The creations of my life recently, has pointed to nothing but the urgency to truly learn this lesson. This time, though, Moments rather than Time existed. The lining up of events and its unfolding and completion all existed within the rhythm of moments. Bang, bang, bang. Each moment counted, and the choice of each moment, completely changed the next moment and so on. And without even realizing, what has been always has dawned. The stepping in is not grand, but natural.

I have come to the point where I will not allow the lovelessness to be anymore. Not from hurt or contraction, but from opening to a point where the inner-heart floods every cell of my being, and the energy of Fire within my heart is pulsing every space within. It is impossible to perpetuate the lovelessness, simply.

And in true and deep Love, I wear a smile that if you would only feel, is embracing you in the deepest Love, that we all are. And it is with this smile, I continue to walk forward, holding my arms open to share this Love with every Soul I am to meet.

I Love You.

Grace

Have we ever wondered what is true healing or true change?

And why we have kept improving on ourselves and the process does not end?

In-truth, we are repeating over and over again ourselves, life time over life time.

What we are missing is a true difference.

 

The difference is the consciousness.

The consciousness in choosing to align to a different energy this time.

There are only two energies in existence, fire and prana.

And prana is what separates humanity and is that which most have aligned to.

Prana is what the human spirit exalts. The spirit is a fragment of God, and has chosen to not express God but itself. Therefore it has the essence of God, but it is separate from God, which is Soul.

 

How many of us have been taught or made known the difference between Soul and spirit?

How many teachers actually know the difference themselves?

Prana, takes us away from the inner-most.

It teaches us to look outside of ourselves for the change.

It has made glamor, maya and illusion look like they are almost natural in life.

We look for the leader, the guru, the spiritual practice, the diet, the miracle foods, the lifestyle, the healing modality, the alternative medicine, the workout, the skincare, the fashion, the luxury, we seek everything in the external, with the hope that they might save or improve us, but that which is within us.

 

That which is within us, is fire.

It is the breath of our inner-hearts.

Fire is the reminder that we as Souls began as unity.

This is the yearning that more and more of us know and remember, it has become unbearable to not return to unity anymore.

Within our inner-hearts, there is only truth.

 

There will be many who will imitate this truth.

They will come very close and echo many similarities to the truth.

But in-truth are still breathed by prana.

We are equal in Soul with these brothers and sisters.

The only difference is a choice of what energy we align with.

 

We could only understand livingness if we become livingness.

Just as we could only understand unity if we cease to align with separation.

Without first acknowledging that it is our own spirit which has caused us separation and that we are indeed empty, there could not be real change.

It is the pride of spirit, which prevents us from experiencing the real difference.

And spirit will not go gently into the goodnight, it will try everything to prevent us from seeing that IT is the cause of separation.

 

But love will bring us home.

In the stillness of the heart, we will feel her impulses, we will begin to feel truth.

The love of oneself is the listening of every murmur in our inner-hearts, and walking with it.

Do not be fooled by glamor, self-love has nothing to do with rewarding ourselves with more that comes from the outside.

Do not be fooled by maya, living by the reactions of emotions is not love.

Do not be fooled by illusion, believing we are somehow unequal to others is first a separation of oneself within, and not love.

 

Love is the stillness within.

There is no emotion in love.

Love is not anything we think it is or have been taught that it is.

It is never too late to discover the true face of love.

For love will bring us home to our inner-hearts.

Where we will meet grace.

 

 

 

 

 

Nostalgia

I am nostalgic today.

Nostalgic for what is simplicity and love.  Authentic exchanges between human beings; open-hearted and non-expectant caring; simple gestures spontaneous from the impulses of the heart, unfiltered from the mind.

Nostalgic for fearlessness, not from impulsiveness, but from deep play in life.  Where each moment is full and satiety overflows.

Nostalgic for eyes that light up with joy, with no reason at all.  For hugs that engulf and speak volumes without uttering a word.

I am nostalgic today.  For the fire of the sun.  And more so for the fire within me.

Simplicity

Life is actually very simple.

Our spirit and our minds are masters in making everything much more complicated, and most of the times, we buy into it.

We create multitudes of complex situations in life due to separating from our Soul.  The pain which results in turn lead us to seek for outside solutions, which does not actually heal, but cause more pranic energy, and hence, more pain.  Deep down we may be aware that how we go through life does not solve anything, yet because of the spirit’s pride, we are unwilling to admit it or change the energy we have aligned ourselves with.

In- truth, it is unlikely that we are experiencing this for the first time.  What we have experienced in previous reincarnations will naturally feel more comfortable for us in this life, and consequently, we go through it again, unaware.  If we do not stop and make a conscious choice to experience something different, we will go through lifetime over lifetime, supporting prana; leading us further and further separated from the Soul, where unity lies.

In deep pain, some choose to ignore or avoid it.  But life is not just love and light.  We cannot cover up what is there, and hope it will go away.  It won’t.  If we don’t choose to face truth, truth will catch up with us and make us face it.  Facing truth may bring up emotions, be aware that in these moments, we may become controlled by the emotions that surface.  If this happens, it is only just another game that perpetuates prana.  It is unnecessary to immerse oneself in gatherings or meetings which support the arousal of emotions, because any situation which encourages the mass expression of any kind of emotion, is causing more pranic energy to be released into the world.

Prana, or emotions, is the root cause of all pain, and dis-eases on the planet.  It is also what the Mother Earth is desperately trying to re-harmonize herself from.

The imminent more frequent upheavals of the Mother Earth, termed as “disasters” by mankind, is a wake up call for all.  Life until now is not working for the planet.  Unless we begin to see differently, choose differently, what has been, cannot be the way forward.  Choose to connect back with your Soul.  Return back to the inner heart.

The recent earthquakes and tsunami around the planet may have brought you back into your heart.  Albeit a shattering, the heart is felt once again.  This is a beginning.  Now we know what it feels like to have a heart.  We begin to feel what is a connection to all, that what has happened to the people in another part of the world, could have easily happened to us.  Nothing is a separate or individual incident.

From the space of the heart, which still experiences emotions, gradually we return to the inner heart.  Here there is stillness.  There is Joy, Harmony and Love.  In the inner heart, there are no emotions such as elation, because to experience elation requires one to rise from somewhere low (depression) to somewhere high (elation).  But Joy is a feeling in the inner heart, it is permanent.

When we return to the inner heart, life returns to Simplicity.  And the planet will also reflect that back to us.

Photo: CK (Secret Nine Productions)

Choose Fire

Can you imagine how it would be like if nothing ever changes?

And can you imagine how it would be like if everything changes in a split second?

In the experience of life we have probably chosen somewhere in between.  Generally speaking there are two types of conscious changes that happen for those who wish to be aware of them.

The first type of change is a desire to improve on something,  because we feel there is a lack within us, in desperation, we search for something outside of ourselves to fix what we feel is lacking, be it health, relationships, career etc.  We need to feel good again, feel young again, feel vitality again,  feel whole again, but we don’t know how or why.  Therefore, we try from yoga to shopping therapy; veganism to guru-worshipping; drug and alcohol dependence to religion devotion, everything we can lay our hands on in the external world.  Desperately, we search and grasp, still without knowing what it is that is causing the deep agony we wish to distract ourselves from.  This type of change is such that causes and accumulates more prana in one’s life, in other words, it is the desperate fight that spirit puts up before going into the good night.

The second type of change is when the utter agony caused by the first type of change  (or no change at all) is too much to bear any longer.  Then there is no other choice, but to return inward, back towards oneself.  This is sometimes presented as a wake up call–when something in life changes dramatically such as an outbreak of  illness, relationship breakdowns, accidents etc.  When we consciously return, we know there is no where to go and nothing to improve.  When we realize we are whole and in unity with all by returning to our SOULS, the search ends and life begins.

Life is a returning.  Going back within, into our inner hearts, is not an abstract or elusive thing.  It is walking waking life, each moment, with our inner hearts.  It is not keeping this knowledge in our minds, and still go through life numbing ourselves with all kinds of distraction such as compulsive working and studying, television, movies, alcohol, drugs, sex, food, facebook, even meditation with an inappropriate intent, and the list goes on.  It is dealing with life, every moment as it comes.  When we begin to see and act through our inner hearts, life becomes an experience of GRACE.  The inner struggles, fighting and disharmony dissolve, and we begin to breathe and live FIRE rather than prana.

This is the beginning of glory in one’s life.  And this moment, everything changes, truly, in a blink of an eye.