Let life be our art
A child can see and hear multitudinous more than a grown up, sometimes. For we are all born with eyes and ears, nose, limbs and tongue, inside our hearts.
As a child I can feel so much going on, is not it. It is not truth. Simply because it does not feel right within my heart. Yet, as a child, having such natural feelings can overwhelm, not so much because of feeling them, but more so how to communicate these feelings to a world, and be understood, when the world does not communicate in this way. From very young, I have made up my mind, that no one would understand.
Yet, feeling I continued.
Growing up, my ears could hear so much more than what was spoken, all the honesty unexpressed, but niceties wrapped up in sugar and honey was how we communicated. So I stopped speaking. Because I do not know how to not speak truth–the truth of the reality that moment, and the truth which is absolute in my heart.
For many years I felt distraught, but never did I give up on the truth that my heart knows, although sometimes I chose to not heed it. Not knowing how to otherwise, I began exploring this in art, (without studying it–my degree is in chinese studies) where possibilities are endless. Art is an arena where beyond that of “reality” can be expressed freely, although, I was actually only wishing to express the reality that most have forgotten to be true.
I began taking pictures, from a second hand automatic camera. I wrote and wrote and wrote to allow all the conflicts that I felt but have not expressed throughout the years to flow. No coincidence that I got myself a job with no experience in photography or journalism, in a magazine publication.
I did not want to “create”. I am not interested in making up something that I feel may be better. I know there is a better. And this better simply begins with being loving to every single being. I only wanted to express this in all ways possible with this vehicle.
And thus, life, has become my art and my medicine.